Dear Spam

Contrary to popular belief, spam comments are somewhat revitalizing for your blog. they offer interesting comments.some good and some not-so-good. Basically. The world’s gone to shit if you think about the millions of people searching the net all day trying to find a solution to a problem they don’t even know exists. But it exists because the internet in some way plays on our beliefs about our worldly wisdom and makes us think that sharing is caring when what it really is mess.

My observations about Spam are this – comment if relevantly you feel moved to. Don’t blabber on about this technical device or this porn site or this new leg warmer you need to sell because you are technically only wasting your time. My positive chatter aside, Spam you are indistinctly the worst case of mad-cow disease I have ever heard of, you are mad-people disease. You are all fucking crazy because you write to me but you don’t know me and you think I’ll listen. Whereas I write but I don’t expect any of you to listen and even more prevalent to that is the fact that when you do listen I want you to listen and humble yourself…You cannot do that. You are not welcome on this blog so fuck off.

Yours truthfully,
Dramasque Diva


My brain drives at the possibilities of what was my drug, and what is now the sole fruit of my motivation. It’s not love…it never was.

I begin to not comprehend where I am, I am drowning in this drug of life..this drug that has become my home..

Injected in to my heart, like satan in a little child, I begin to reprimand what I would do if I lost balance,

Torn away from the sole heir of my psychological balance, the plasma that constructed my imagination,

I frightens me and eyes wild as two hares in a headlight, I begin to see the death of my little imagination, my little world dropping,

The bewilderment, the horror!!!the ATROCITY!! how dare thee?!!

don’t let go off me..

hold me…. drug me…

I contemplate craziness as a new opportunity and my sole objective is light the stage and show them how crazy I can be,

The money will flow and the candles will light brighter than ever before, my drug will sit and stare at me,

…with motherly eyes knowing full well that it made me what I am today,

I shall not bow my head nor let go off the GO, the breaking point is only defined by what you make of it,

A pinch of salt there, a sip of my drug here and there is no end, but many beginnings, and many more moments of pleasure,

I endure… I endure to tell you that I am non-accepting of this facsimile farce of society, they are fake and I will make,

A lifelong decision to stick to what I know, drug of mine don’t let me go, let me shine…

Don’t falter because I know you want to!damnnit!!DAMN!!DAMNNNN U!!!I thought we were in this together??!

together forever?…

don’t let me fall…?

Sobriety is a powerful thing and I wish to ALL the gods in this lifetime, grant me this wish of sobriety,

Prosperity and never jealousy, but simplicity of life comes with sobriety,

This drug doesn’t let me fall, you will not let go, let me be my own person and I will join you in another lifetime,

But sobriety, oh sobriety escapes my soul and is frightened as I am…I am frightened of another life outside my drug,

Maintain your eloquence oh, ye, naive dumplings and never shadow your belligerence,

Remain calm and walk in the moonlight of wish and hope, drugs will calm you but destroy, ye innocent souls,

Smash those angry belligerent thoughts and kill your motives, the true motives are never under duress..

Dress those souls in white and walk in the virginal bathtub of heaven, let angels wash your body with l’oil…and le vin.

Catch the drops as they fall from your eyes to the floor, drugs of ours are never pleasures of yours,

Save yourselves..


Save me…
Save me….

Save me before i kil…ki…..kill

Drug, sweet drug, lets cuddle and be the best of friends, because even though I cannot identify the main root of my motivation,

I know that I can be a fly on the wall, a butterfly in a paradise and it’s made possible under the influence,

The simplest invisible hand in my life makes it possible for me to fly up high and not sink down low,

The spirit of my existence has a best friend,

I’m happy because it makes me comprehend that my place is not seated but standing and running full speed ahead to where I want to go,

We all need drugs, I don’t know where I dropped the pill-box in my life,
Ir-removed from my present state of thinking I think beyond what I see,

Will you join me?

Black Swan

Hi all,
Maybe I’m writing the posts that actually prompt me to or maybe I’m writing ones when I’m seated on the computer because it makes it easier.

Black Swan

There is this movie called the black swan and it is very nice.It’s about a girl who needs to do a ballet performance and she struggles trying to find her tempo (the negative mood) that she is expected to exude in the play. Her bad side(which is her subconscious) gets the best of her and makes her learning process difficult. She becomes confused, disoriented and weirdly nostalgic because she cant grasp how out of control her emotions(being on the bad side) really are.

Natalie Portman plays this role so well that she must be given a handclap for her daring performance. I forced my brother to watch it, and he probably hates me by now. This movie is so thrilling and it left me feeling weirdly closer to secy. I admit everybody has a good and bad side.

Ever since I landed in the LoO I have felt strangely tempted and cornered by secy’s thoughts. Everything is so much bigger, better, clearer. I can almost taste the sweat of the HD tv that my uncle and aunt have in their house. My tri-sexuality is tested and i have envisioned myself actually trying some of those bad bi-sexual actions. Secy is tested, I am tested. And it is the most difficult thing to deter from.

Like all posts I can’t continue this one till I am fully settled at the University Within. Just wanted to recommend the movie to you all. Go watch it!

And remember there is a bad side in all of us that will be tested.


The feeling makes me want to shake,
I’m losing – my brakes,
Dont make me think about the consequences,
Just placate – placate me

Can’t really understand you now
Dont cry – just leave me
I hate you and I hate everything about you now,
Dont know – what the deal is
Im down
Look in the mirror can't stop the girl,
Spinning in – her own world
Anger boiling and thats the fucking problem with,
The world – today

I don’t want to argue with you now
Smash – your teeth in
Anger sizzling I can’t hear a sound because you’re,
Muscling – In
I’m down

Just wanna store the bodies in the ground and shhhhhh…
Shut – up
I don’t miss you, I don’t love you, don’t wanna hear a sound
Shut – up

The darkness calls, its mine forever don’t tear me away,
Rip – your heart out
I don’t really care what those people say,
Don’t care – about povert – y
I’m down